Large timepieces. It's a big mystery. A 40mm diameter watch case became the new normal a few years ago. Before Woodstock, a man's dress watch was 32mm in diameter. Young people are unaware that things were not always this way. Perhaps they believe that men were pygmies a generation or two ago. The times have changed. But why is that? . . .

First and foremost, I must confess that I am one of those hidebound traditionalists who believes that 34mm is the proper size. I'm old enough to have been raised with this belief. People will refer to me as an emaciated hipster, and they will be correct. My wrists are smaller. I'm hoping I don't find out how much weight gain is required to swell noticeably near a joint.

I could be elitist and use Paul Fussell's phrase "prole drift," which he defines as "an unavoidable byproduct of mass production, mass selling, mass communication, and mass education" that leads to ongoing cultural debasement.

People who openly prefer humongous watches and dismiss traditional proportions support this. They rarely discuss beauty, functionality, or technology. "hur hur you got a small wrist!" is a common refrain. "I'm a real man, and I need a big watch!"

I wish I had a more upbeat, charitable response. I don't. The unified theory is almost entirely based on crassness. Worst of all, I find myself agreeing with those snooty hipsters at the Dinkee. Worse, there appears to be no way to reverse this. The pendulum may swing the other way at some point, but it appears to be beyond my and your control.

Watches do not require frequent replacement (unless you lend them to a toddler). To maintain demand, factories must stay in business, and designers must create new, truly desirable looks or features. No, but some people still try.The easy way out is to simply increase the size and see if that fools people into thinking their watch is out of date.

There could be an additional layer of duping going on. Prices can rise if people believe that these largely empty watch cases actually represent a beefier or more premium device, even though, in most cases, only some additional cheap metal casing and plastic spacer plastic has been added.